Welcome, Kazakhstan!

Fun fact: Although Kazakhstan is the world's
largest landlocked nation, it has its own
navy. And not one of their ships has
ever been sunk in battle!

So glad you could drop by for a visit. You are the 72nd country to visit our humble little abode and we couldn't be happier to have you aboard.

Your visit prompted me to do a little research into your fair land, and I've got to tell you, I'm impressed. Beautiful vistas, bizarrely cool architecture, and you're freakin' enormous. (Largest landlocked nation in the world, boys and girls!)

You lose a few points for your recent media-relations tactics and that whole potential bubonic plague thing, but those are little more than pesky distractions.

I've just set up an auto-search of your country and I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with that I can riff on. If you have any ideas, just let me know.

So just make yourself at home. We've got some cold beer in the fridge and clean towels in the hall closet. If you need anything, just holler.